Nicki Minaj - Pink Friday

       

     She's currently the most talked about rapper. Hands down.  This little lady's fame is rivaled only by the king of controversy himself, Kanye West. But when we talk about the female wave of rappers, Nicki has certainly staked her claim and made her mark. 

       Let me first say that I am a fan of Lil' Kim. Like it or not, it matters. For the younger generation of listeners, Lil' Kim is now just a played out "has been" as Nicki slyly addresses to a nameless target in "Roman's Revenge". But if you're old enough to remember the most recent wave of female rappers (including Trina, Foxy, Eve, Da Brat, Missy Elliot and many more) you know how hesitant I might be to hand the crown over to Miss Minaj. And Miss Minaj herself understands my hesitance. 

       When Nicki first appeared on the scene, I was skeptical as most. I was, without holding back, comparing her bar to bar with Kim who will , in my eyes, forever be the Queen. You have to understand that for me, Kim was the first female to stand toe to toe with men on a lyrical basis. The only female who could get on a track with Notorious BIG, Jay-Z and the rest of them and hold her weight. To absolute annihilate the track. I mean, think back on Kim's verse on "All About the Benjamins". I challenge anyone to show me a hotter verse. Hers was the best verse in the whole fucking song. So Nicki had a lot to prove to me over time.  I mean, I think we were all haters. I know I was and I highly doubt there is even one day-one Nicki fan. The girl is pretty and her looks have gotten her a long way in the game. Not to say that she can't flow, but image is a a more influential part of Hip-Hop than it ever has been. Nicki might be the most attractive female Hip-Hop artist we've seen thus far. Although taste changes with time... we all have to admit that baby girl is BAD at a reported (but not verified) 34-26-45 which is astounding if she's 5'2. & I LOVE that she's 5'2. The baddest bitches are all 5'2, ya know: Jada Pinket-Smith, Eva Longoria(used to be)Parker, Salma Hayek..... & yours truly ;) lol

        "Everything I try to teach 'em, the gonna see it in time" in the appropriately titled "I'm the Best" which just so happens to be track #1. She's come into the game strong and not only made her mark in the eyes of those within her Young Money camp, but respected lyricists like Mr. West & President Carter as to have been featured with them on West's single, "Monster" (& she ripped the verse, might I say). Minaj also features Mr. West on her debut album in  "Blazin'" where she attacks the beat furiously as she busts a BustaBust-like flow, addressing the situation I just described with charisma and a talented, playful way with words: 

How could it be little me

had the power to be

the best B in the league. 

Yea, inevitably.

But could it be?

Little me  you was heckling me?

Now its monotony 
when I regularly 
appeal?

I catch wreck on recreation. 

So I exceed all your expectations.

Bitches aint got it in 'em. 

I kill 'em and then I skin 'em. 

The contact was signed

but I am the addendum.  

       You either love or hate her & her Barbie movement. But if you hate it, it might simply be that you don't understand. 

The whole album is crack

you aint even got to skip a track

I aint gotta get a plaque

I aint got to get awards

I just walk up out the door

all the girls will applaud

all the girls will commend 

as long as they understand 

that I'm fighting for the girls

who never thought they could win

cause before they could being 

you told them it was the end

But I am here to reverse 
the curse 
that they live in. 

        I've mentioned this ordeal before in my post Black Barbie: The Baddest Barbie in the World, the unfortunate circumstance that throws young Black girls into a state of self-loathing because of their skin color. We are typically considered the bottom of the bucket and the prettiest of us are usually lucky enough to be "pretty for a black girl." No matter how you phrase that, it always hurts. Like we can only be but so beautiful and our skin color is holding up back from this other level of attractiveness that we can't seem to reach. That's bullshit and I applaud Nicki Minaj for being a sista (although she is a phtoshopped and lightened version) and holding it down for the rest of us. Like she says in "Fly" ft. Rihanna (reviewed Rihanna's Loud too, check it here)

Everybody wanna try to box me in.

Suffocating everytime it locks me in.

Paint they own pictures, then they crop me in.

But I will remain where the top begins.

Cuz I am not a word. 

I am not a line.

I am not a line.

I am not a girl that can ever be defined. 

I am not fly; 

I am levitation. 

I represent an entire generation. 

     The generation she speaks of is that of a multitude of girls (and women, even) who need a voice. We've been silent for so long. It's been so long since we could stand side by side with men and hold our own (in the Hip-Hop world that is). There haven't been many songs we could sing along to and exert as much passion and strength as our male counterparts can. For the older "Barbies", it's been a while since someone gave us an anthem to to sing to. For the younger Barbs, they finally have someone to call their own. 

     There is a smidgen of humanity in this album that I'm looking forward to hearing more of. We barely know Nicki. This album has shed a beam of light into a very dark hole. But there are still dark corners in there we have yet to see. The song that speaks the most truth and gives further understanding into the ugly beauty of Barbie World is "Dear Old Nicki," where she literally speaks to the girl she used to be. I'm going to insert the verses here because I think it's important that you read what she's saying. I'm afraid there are few people listening to her. I know how that feels, it happens a lot to black girls. 

Maybe you died 

Cuz everybody ask me where you at

I try to channel you in hopes that I can steer you back

But it's like very intersection, we just missed eachother

you got your fans waitin.

Tell me you aint 6 feet under. 

And tell me that you coming back. That you just took a break. 

Maybe I blamed you for everything. 

That was my mistake. 

In hindsight I loved your rawness & I loved your edge

Cuz it was you who talked me down from jumping off the ledge.

Your earrings bamboo. Your long nails, too. 

Your BMW every time you came through.

You was the braveheart.

You stole Wayne's heart.
You never switched it up. 

You played the same part.

But I needed to grow and I needed to know.

Were there was something inside me that I needed to show. 

So I just deaded you. 

Left you in all black. 

But damn, old Nicki, please call back. 

[Chorus]

You Told Me You’d Come When I Needed You
And You Said It So Sweetly I believed you
But Im Standing Here Calling I Cant See You
But I Am Holding You, Holding You, Holding You To That

Yo, I did chase the glitz and the glamour, money, fame and power?

Cuz if I did, that will forever go down my lamest hour.

I shoulda kept you with me, getting at them nameless cowards.

They was no match for you. 

Couldn't defeat your prowress. 

I had to make them changes. I hope you understood. 

You see, for every bad, I did a ton of good. 

But you was underground. 

And I was mainstream. I live that life now that we would daydream

My only wish is you come enjoy it with me.

Get on them conference calls. Go meet them lawyers with me.

The money came, yea. I tripled and quadrupled it. 

But I still miss us when we was on some stupid shit. 

But it's still fuck the media.

They ridiculed you, never believed in ya.

They just deaded you. Left you in all black.

But... Dear, old Nicki,

Please call back. 

      I'm not sure we understand what these artists are going through as human beings. I touched on this a bit in my post "For the Love of Hip-Hop." These artists feel alone. They are the constant targets of hatred and envy. That last song from Nicki is the best I've ever heard an artist explain the image change one goes through when shifting from nothing to something. Especially as a black female, you're asked to change yourself at every turn. On her old stuff (and those old pictures) Nicki's image was a lot louder... a lot raunchier. Not sexy... more trashy. Now she's begun to go over into a more elegant and tasteful sort of sexy that I hope continues to evolve and  demand more respect. I understand her and her torn relationship with herself. How many of us also grow up with an "if anybody says anything to me" attitude, ready to fight at the club and "always down" attitude, the honestly gets you no where and holds you back. This tough exterior isn't completely an exterior, it becomes who you are and as violent and ill-concieved as it may be, it is what makes you strong. It's what guides you through and helps you survive goring up in certain places. It's what "Talk[s you] down from jumping off the ledge."  

      Nicki is very... very alone. There are few females out there right now (making money) that she can confide in. Most people making money in her industry, who share he mind-frame and upbringing are men. And the women out there making money probably haven't seen or gone through all the things that's she's gone through. Still, this album chronicles a "Moment 4 Life" that she'd definitely want to have on repeat. Nicki is a super pretty bitch now, but she wasn't always this girly, sex symbol with pink lipstick. But one thing can be said: She made it. Success is the ultimate aphrodisiac: "This moment just reminded me of everything they deprived me of. Put your drinks up. IT's a celebration everytime we link up. We done everything they could think of. Greatness is what we on the brink of," she flows in "Moment 4 Life" Ft. Drake. This girl is living life and for any Ella, Barbie, women girl or whatever you would like to call yourself who feels like she's in her prime, Nicki has hits you'll definitely want to listen to, cuz she's the only bitch doin it how it should be done: "Bitch, I get money so I do what I pleases. I live where the muthafuckin pools and trees is. Broke bitches so crusty. Disgust me. Gave the bitch a ride, got the continental dusty... couple wet wipes case a bum try to touch me. Ew!" She's really a funny, bitch y'all. lol. That's entertainment. 

     Overall, I wasn't blown out the water, but I was entertained.  Nicki has started to hang with what I will call the "right" group of people (The Jays and Kanyes) and I hope their genius rubs off on her. She's capable of deeper contemplation that this album put out. I think she needs to do more studying. More reading. She needs to educate herself about the world around her and find more to talk about. With this, not only will her content grow, but the quality of her writing. Nicki says some cool, witty stuff (like "I am not fly; I am levitation"), but there are certain phrases that can be phrased better. With better vocabulary for example. Her rhymes are too simple for my taste. She needs to develop as a writer. For example, I liked the "addendum" metaphor in "Blazin'" and I really wanted more of that.

     I think Nicki has more to say. This was a great start for her as an artist versus a pop star. I look forward seeing Nicki grow and say the things she wants to say without hesitation. I want to know how the real Nicki thinks. I want more verses like those in "Dear Old Nicki," and "Fly" that express emotion and elicit thought. Dear new/old Nicki --whoever is there --you're the only voice we have at the moment. I hope you continue to speak for us and use it wisely. To all of our advantages. 

Great start, Nicki. I'm looking forward to more.  

 Oh, & until she can stand toe-to-toe with the likes of Erykah Badu and Lauryn Hill, Nicki Minaj is not the best female rapper. If you disagree, seems to me you haven't heard much music in your time. Sorry,  Nicki, but you can't have that title just yet, baby girl --if at all. Only time will tell.

Thank you, Mr. West.

I sit here in awe and admiration on every level. 

        This morning, I ran across Kanye West's Runaway, his first short film that premiered a couple days ago. I'm not going to outline the whole film, you can/should click the link and watch it for yourself. Make sure you've set aside the time because it is 35 minutes long. 

        Let me begin by saying that this is a film as West has described it himself. As I was watching it, my little cousin looked over my shoulder and asked "what are you watching?" because glancing at this will rise questions in any passerby. Then (after he saw Mr. West on screen) he said "Oh, this is the Kanye video!" "It's not a video," I snapped back, "it's a film." 

       Now I know I shouldn't have given him that much attitude, but he caught me in the midst of the dinner scene where West brings his new "girlfriend" to dinner and everyone is --ironically -- appalled by her. There are various images and scenes in this film that warrant exploration, but this one scene is my favorite. All the dinner guests are Black. There is really no variation in skin tones among them, either. They are all a beautiful deep brown, contrasting, first with the dinner setting (everything is white) and the people serving their food (also all white). There is something the tugs at me with this image of pale, blue-eyed, blonde haired girls serving this table of --what look like and most likely are -- the descendants of African Kings and Queens. 

     The film is loaded with imagery deserving of discussion. Like the conversation at the dinner table that sets West off or the people marching wearing red KKK-ish outfits. The small bits of conversation had within the film (ie: "Don't pay attention to anything you hear on the news.") are without doubt purposeful and bold statements that are a watered down version of the Kanye we've experienced in the past. 

     I took a class on Underground film once in which we studied the likes of Andy Warhol and Salvador Dali. We watched and discussed their films in depth. Some films had a plethora of meaning ---like Dali's Un Chien Analou (1929) -- while others were more open to artistic interpretation like Warhol's Mario Banana (1964). I believe that Mr. West should be studied in the same degree the rest of these artists are studied. If a Warhol filming a tranny eating a banana can be considered art, Mr. West should face no opposition in the art world. I don't think West's work has any less integrity than these men. To write him off because he is involved in (and actually enhanced the integrity of) Hip-Hop, is to make a grave mistake. Being a Pop icon shouldn't shadow an artist's work --although it always does and the situation becomes even more complex and taxing with the amount of melanin in that person's skin tone.  

      People need to learn Kanye West. Similar to how I told this Mac's dictionary to learn spelling of Kanye and never put a dotted red line under this name again. (I wish I could right click on people.) Mr. West, in my opinion, is a vault of artistic genius. I'm am greatly pleased by this video and encourage all to see it. I truly believe it's going to hit two different levels, though. The film is entertaining enough to hold the attention of a mass audience, but if taken into the classroom, could spark wondrous conversation. 

       Here's what this video says to me: Kanye West is an artist. While we give him  his "respect" now, his posthumous  fame is going to be greater than we can imagine. And as an artist with so much public attention, combined with his personal dealing with life, love and loss... he is somewhat dangerous.   Toni Morrison wrote in her novel, Sula, "Like any artist without an art form, [he will] become dangerous." I just read into Van Gogh because West mentions the artist in "Power (Remix)", and found out that Van Gogh shot himself in the chest after a long streak of depression.  I sincerely hope Mr. West has found himself and his art, his art in himself and himself in his art. I worry about him...We, as a society, need to lay off him and understand that he is a normal person. I mean.....Let he without sin cast the first stone... I don't have to tell you what book that's from. 

      Mr. West is a master. A master of audible sound, written verse, combinations of fabrics and name brands, visual entertainment, truth and honesty.  Thank you, Mr. West. Thank you for coming back to us and bringing Hip-Hop with you. Thank you.

Hip-Hop, welcome back, babe. I've missed you. 

Praise is Due to the Most Fly: Prada.

 "If you grew up with holes in your zapatos, you'd celebrate the minute you was having dough." - 

Jay-Z "99 Problems" 

     I balled out, yo. In a very mediocre way, of course. For now, I'm living within my means. My eyes gravitate towards monograms and logos but... I'm not quite there yet. So before I make my way to Neiman Marcus, I'm going to make my rounds at Macy's and see what they've got on sale for me. Still, I've made significant improvements.  For example, MAC got me for $200 this week. And I'll probably go back. The only makeup I wear from your local drugstore is Maybelline's Great Lash Mascara because it actually works better than others I've tried & year after year, it's rated number one.  I have a fixation with quality. & As my eye score the racks, there's so many things I need...  Last Saturday, I didn't want to go all the way back to Jersey to get my things so, I had to buy everything except shoes, but including a bra and underwear. If you ever think I'm acting "brand new", it's probably because I kind of am. 

Again, I [mediocre] balled out, yo:

Saturday, September 18th. 

$19.95 White Blazer at H&M

$139.90 MAC Makeup --  Mineralize Finish Powder in "Dark", Pro Long-wear Concealer in "NW 40", & Cremesheen Glass lipgloss in "DeeLight" 

$46.50 White Dress at Cliquers on 34th. See my Dress!!! (This place is pretty cheap & somehow I spend $46 on a damned dress. Fashion sense is a gift & a curse.)

Monday, September 20th

$93.48 on B.S. tops & cardigans for work at Charlotte Russe.  I actually got this tank top for $2.99 and can you believe this tank top (my fav buy of that day; I got it in the lighter pink) is dry clean only? WhyTF is Charlotte Russe making dry clean only clothes?

Thursday, September 23rd 

$68.00 Jessica Simpson Ciera Grey Suede Booties 

Saturday, September 25th. 

$55.53 MAC Makeup -- Leopard Luex Pallet and  Brow Pencil 

$107.99 on Dolce Vita Vienna Tread Sole Heels  @ Macy's ON SALEE!!!! (Cashier hooked me up with the 10% Visitor Discount, too!)

$80.43 -- Last minute outfit at H&M (I'd show you what a bought, but you can't shop H&M Online: Black velour leggings, & a black top with a leather sash across the top. Simple, all black everything. )

$44.00 Drinks @ Mamajuana Cafe. & NOT because I had to. 

     Here's the thing though, I don't have any responsibilities. Call it what you want. I live with my sister. I don't pay rent. I buy food (oh yea, & I spent $200 at Whole Foods.. smh) when needed. I don't have kids and if I feel like missing a meal so that I can get some new shoes, that's my business.  Call me superficial if you want. I welcome you to say, "Eff Ella, she's fake."  I'm on a diet anyways. Luckily, like Nicki said, my pockets eatin cheescake!! 

Everybody knows I'm a mother-effin MONSTER. (download here). 

      From this list alone, I'm spending $200 in shoes, $200 in makeup and $200 in clothes a week. That's $600 a week to maintain my ego. I mean, I didn't even do the math.  Feel free to check it for me, but please be aware that this doesn't take into account my MTA card, my PATH card, movies, food, drinks at 809 last week, or things like... body wash. & don't count those things cheap.  When I go to the movies, I like an Icee, Dibs, a chocolate and a candy plus a "biggest size you got" Pepsi for my cousin & whatever else his heart desires. As for body wash, my skin prefers Neutrogena (OMG this Grapfruit one works soooooo well, try it.). I treat myself, and my company, well. Very well. 

   Now, I'm not braggin (or am I?) but I just got a new job where I'm treated fairly well. I'm not a millionaire. Nowhere close. But I'm living life. I'm not going to tell anyone how much I make, but I will tell y'all what I spend.  Yesterday, I stood at the Sunglass Hut in Herald Square with a this pair of Raybans for $185 in one hand and this pair of Pradas for $225 in the other.  You don't have to click off the page if you don't want to: they were the same exact thing with the label being the only difference & $40 in price. But... where do you think I was leaning to?  At the end of the day, Thursday is payday and I'm getting these. You might think $310 is too much to spend on a pair of glasses, but I was walking in the bright sun with my boss the other day, too ashamed to put on my cheap sunglasses because he is THAT fly.  Besides, I'm a label whore & I can afford it.

I never pray to God, I pray to Prada. 

     I used to get upset when people said that I'm spoiled, but it doesn't affect me anymore. I get what I want. Either it's given to me, or I work my ass of for it. I get my way. When I go out to  eat with my family, I'm not allowed to look at prices. My brother used to say that the guy who ends up with me is going to have his work cut out for him. My favorite dish is a medium-rare tenderloin topped with lobster tail. I'm only saying that because if they make it, I want it. When I go out with my cousins, I "don't have to worry about nothing." That's what I was told last night... and all nights before. I buy drinks because I can, not because I have to. & When I buy drinks, I'm buying a ROUND.  I don't need anybody's money.

      I'm only going to spend more. The chump change I'm spending now is just a warm up. It's like... stretching. I'm on a real "fuck niggas" trip right now, so I'm gonna surprise myself with Louboutins for Christmas and Guiseppes for Valentines day. IDK what I want for my birthday yet. A bag maybe?

     I'm most grateful for never having to hope that somebody buys me something or pays my way somewhere. Everything I want, I buy.  And when you come from nothing, that is everything. (& That's a topic for a whole other blog.  Read my  Eff the Jones's. I'd rather keep up with the Smith's.)  Forgive me, but I never imagined I'd be able to ball out like I did this week (and I didn't have to take my clothes off or sleep with anyone). That was my first paycheck. Do you understand the damage I'm going to be doing as time progresses and money accumulates in my bank account? Dooo yoouu???   

With that said, I hope Prada blesses you all. Goodnight!