A Lesson in Diamonds.

Rumor's you on the verge of a new merge cuz that rock on your finger is like a tumor. You can't fit your hand in your new purse. Beyonce ft. Jay-Z, "Upgrade You"

    How much should a man spend, you ask? As much as he can really. When it comes to diamonds & engagement rings, a man should be spending 15% of what he makes in a year. Where'd I get that figure? I mean...common courtesy. Think of it as a tip. I figure, the better a woman I am, the better a tip I deserve. I'm shooting for 18% because I have excellent customer service skills. That's why I don't want a ring until he's really ready. Emotionally and financially. I already did my math, my man needs to make at $66,666.67 a year (divide how much you want your ring to cost by 0.15). Yup. Because I want my ring be by $10,000 or more. If your mouth dropped, you've obviously never looked at diamonds before. I'll explain the figure soon. As for his salary requirement, In New York, I don't think that's too much to ask. I mean, I don't plan on marrying for a couple years, giving "Him" the time to get his degree, that advance and the dream job he's been talking about. We'll do it, baby. Teamwork! ;)

For this post, I thought I'd share my ideas on my absolute favorite things: Diamonds. 

     A Lesson in Diamonds. 

Courtesy of Ella's Thoughts

     I want 1 WHOLE stone. Well.. I'll take as many WHOLE stones as he wants to give me but I want each one of them whole. Not 5 or 6 little stones glued together in a setting to pretend it's one rock. You know this is the deal when the # of carats is followed by "tw," total weight. Diamonds, pressed stone, have to be naturally made the earth, small stones have been interrupted in their process. Whole stones have been forming for longer, therefore they cost more. So, with that said. I want

       I want a $10,000+ ring. Yes. I do. If you ladies have done your research, you should know that 1carat will run about $9,000... Well, at Tiffany's it does at least. (Wait, Zales' is on the pricey end, too. Kay comes in at about half the price.) But I just like I want a whole stone, can I get a whole carat, too, please? Eff what you've heard. Size matters. Picture this: Me and the bar with my girls. Your cheap ring on my finger. When a man comes up to me, I'm going to ask him, "Can you do better than this?" The more likely he says yes, the more likely that ring sicks. I refuse to be embarrassed. On the same topic, my sister has a preeettttyyy nice ring. I can't go home with this grain of sand and show it to her. Every time we hold up wine glasses for a toast I'll be embarrassed.I would have to tell her not to wear her ring to my wedding. I mean... I'm just sayin. I don't think men understand the residual effects of a stupid ring.

     New York seems to have a saying: Location, Location, Location. And I mean... I'm not saying that where you buy the stone matters to everyone... but it does to me. I want to know where my ring came from so I can brag about it. ("Him" said he would want me to brag. We seem to be on the same page so far.) Keep in mind that I'm only asking for Tiffany's a highly commercialized jeweler. I could direct him to Cartier or Van Cleef & Arpels but I'm only being a mild label whore.

     Clarity Part 1: The stone should be clear. Ever notice that some diamonds are clearer than others? Yea.. that matters. The more flawless (no cracks in the middle of the stone) the more valuable the stone. You can get a big stone and the joint just be fuzzy as hell. Diamonds should be clear... like ice! (I wish I had a picture of my sister's ring.) How perfectly frozen cubes of ice are practically see-through? Rappers know about ice, man.

     Clarity Part 2: Clear in your expectations. I plan on taking "Him" to Tiffany's. Just to browse. I want to see how he reacts at the sight of Diamonds and even more so at their prices. This way, we're both on the same page of what I'd be expecting. I don't want to have to say no. I already told "Him" that I would say "Yes, but not with this ring," if it wasn't what I wanted. To this, "Him" responded, "I'd just get you the biggest one so you won't talk shit."

 My kinda man :) More importantly, my kinda ring!

      Cut: The cut of your stone is really up to you. I like the emerald cut because it makes the stone look the biggest. That's my whole reason.

       Base: DO NOT BE FOOLED. Sometimes, the diamond is put on this makeshift pedestal that raises it off your finger, giving the illusion of size but there's nothing but air between your finger and that stone. I need my stone places directly on that band so I know exactly how big it is. Don't play me. 

      Last but not least: Don't settle for less than you deserve. If you want a certain ring. Get that kind of ring. But don't ask for 10 carats if you're not really worth it. I've looked into 10 carats before and had someone say that the guy I was dating would never get that for me. What we failed to explain further was if I wouldn't be getting that ring from him because I didn't deserve it or because he couldn't afford it. Figures we're not dating anymore and the deep seeded reason is because he was cheap. I know I'm not going to get a 10 carat ring. At $10,000 a carat, that's a $100,000 ring that man would need to make 10x more than my fantasy boo. I don't know men you make $666,666.67 a year (I'm sure lookin for them though! So much so that I have this calculator out on my desk for no reason other than to gauge my future husband's salary).  If you're the type of girl who can settle for a ring she doesn't like, I applaud you. You 1000000000x the woman I am. I'm not a good or humble person and I've come to accept that. I think that's what makes me a great person. I also know that I'll have a great ring.

     But hey! Ella's not engaged! Did that cross your mind? I'm not engaged because for a couple reasons. First and foremost, I have yet to meet a man who can afford me. I was proposed to once. I was 15 and it was the first time a boy bought me diamonds. But the ring was stupid. So I told my mom I found it and traded her for hers (which was bigger). But it was a diamond. And my mom still wears it. So Ella was engaged. Loonngg ago. lol. (My trek with men started off pretty seriously, pretty early. Bad for me, awesome for this blog)  Anywhoo... I'm not looking to get married until I meet a grown man who can have a grown conversation about taking grown folks steps in a grown folks relationship and spend some grown man paper on a grown woman ring. I'll let you all know when I meet 'em.

Besides. I'd rather have no ring than a stupid ring.

FYI: I'm no jeweler... but I LOVE Diamonds. It's my birthstone ya know :) So when I ask for jewelry I say "All I want is my birthstone in it." "What's that?" he'll say? "Diamonds," I respond --always with a smile. Shout Out to the Aries' out there!! 

& That, folks, is my lesson in Diamonds :)