This has been a summer for the books.
I came home this summer with no intentions of anything except leaving. Two weeks, I had said. That's as long as I should be home. Well... for THREE MONTHS I waited by the phone and in the meantime, a Lady needs a bit of entertainment. Am I wrong? One of my friends had just gotten out of a relationship, as had I, and so we hit the scene with small dresses, tall heels and little remorse. Our weekends included loud music, flashy jewelry and lots and lots of liquor. It was a summer for Rockstars.
I suppose it was a much needed recuperation from the intense relationships myself and my friends had previously been in. You know, the kind of relationship that ends and you ask, "Where did we go wrong?" After months of perusing the clubs and pursuing our chosen victims, many of the men we got involved with fell flat. Some at the first conversation, others on the first date. Even those we attempted to maintain ran their course over time.
Last night though, was the GREATEST NIGHT I have had in a very long time: Hair done, nails done, everything did. New Dress and my clutch matched with new 5 1/2 inch ALDO heels (same shoe different color from link.. mine are more nude). Our mission for the night?
Ignore them all. Call no one. & be the BADDEST BITCHES in the club (pardon my CF).
Every guy we each hoped would be there was there. Each came up to us and greeted us. After the club, we each got the text we hoped for. But we went out to breakfast (just us ladies), went home and went to sleep. Mission accomplished.
Today? As we returned text messages, the responses weren't as good as the night before. The guys went back to being lame with the same nothing-to-say game. This just leads me to believe that men like to be ignored. They liked the games we play in the club when we say nothing as we sip our vodka-cranberry drinks, dancing with no one but the girls we came with. I promise you, I get more of the sweetest "good morning" and "hey beautiful" messages when I ignore a man than if we converse daily.
Men like a chase. Which is why if you accept a man for who he is, don't require that he take you out, and focus on things other than his money, he has no respect for you. He has nothing to prove. Maybe when I move to NY and never see this one guy again, he'll like me then. And when he does come around I'm going to be what Plies would call a "spoiled brat"... you know.... A "send [me] on vacation with my girls and my momma" & "buy [me] Gucci & Prada" type of girl so he probably won't have a chance in hell with me then. Simply said, men like women who DON'T like them. & with that said...
I am no longer interested.
4 comments:
Excellent post. Alot of ppl can learn from something like this. Keep 'em coming.
Ella, I cannot speak for every guy but I can tell you a lot of guys go to the club to 1)look at girls in revealing clothes 2) grind up and feel up on as much girls as they can 3) try to pick up one or as many as possible for sex in the near or distant future 4) get as much numbers as possible to feed his ego. There may be many more reasons but I am a foreigner living in the US, have attend both black and white universities and my previous reason were the general consensus. Most women fool themselves into thinking that the man of there dreams of even a shadow of that person is waiting in the club for them. I am not saying that it isn't possible but highly unlikely.
Yes men like to hunt but for the reward of sex that why they have nothing meaningful to converse about. When a man is ready looking for a relationship the approach is totally different and most likely it wont be in a club.
Nadir,
You can view my response in my next blog.
http://ellathought.blogspot.com/2010/08/im-not-looking-for-love-im-looking-for.html
Everything you write is so true. I enjoy reading your blogs. They help me deal with some similar situations. Keep it up!
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